What Does HSP Mean – What It Is and What It’s Not

Understanding What It Means To Be A Highly Sensitive Person (HSP)

Have you ever been told you’re “too sensitive” or that you “feel too much”? If so, you’re not alone. Many women, especially those in their late 20s to early 50s, have carried this label for most of their lives, often feeling misunderstood, overwhelmed, or even ashamed of their sensitivity. But there’s a name for this deeply felt experience: being a Highly Sensitive Person, or HSP.

HSP is not a diagnosis or a disorder. It’s a temperament trait—one that describes about 15-20% of the population. While this sensitivity can sometimes be confused with anxiety, depression, or other mental health conditions, being an HSP is something entirely distinct. Understanding what it is—and what it’s not—can offer a huge relief for many women who have spent years wondering why they seem to experience life more intensely than others.

What Is A Highly Sensitive Person?

The term “Highly Sensitive Person” was first introduced by psychologist Dr. Elaine Aron in the 1990s. HSPs have a nervous system that processes information and emotions more deeply. This means you may notice subtleties in your environment, become easily overwhelmed by loud noises or strong smells, and have strong emotional reactions to beauty, injustice, or conflict.

Core features of HSPs often include:

• Deep processing of emotions and information

• A heightened response to sensory input (like lights, sounds, or textures)

• High empathy and emotional responsiveness

• A strong sense of conscience or moral awareness

• A tendency to need more time to rest or recover after stimulation

For HSP women, this often means feeling everything—joy, grief, stress, and connection—on a deeper level. It can be a superpower when nurtured well, but without support or understanding, it can also feel like a burden.

What HSP Is Not: Clearing Up Common Misunderstandings

It’s important to clear up what being an HSP is not. Many HSP women are misdiagnosed or misunderstood because their sensitivity can mimic or overlap with other conditions.

Let’s look at what being an HSP is not:

• It is not anxiety: While both anxiety and HSPs involve heightened reactivity, anxiety is typically driven by fear or excessive worry, whereas HSPs are responding to stimulation itself, not necessarily danger or fear. That said, chronic overstimulation without support can lead to anxiety over time.

• It is not depression: HSPs may feel intense sadness or grief, but this doesn’t mean they are clinically depressed. Depression involves a deeper, longer-lasting disruption in mood and functioning. However, when sensitivity is misunderstood or shamed, it can lead to emotional withdrawal, which may look like depression.

• It is not a trauma response: Trauma can heighten sensitivity, and many HSPs have experienced early trauma. But being highly sensitive is not automatically a trauma symptom. Rather, HSP is an inborn trait, though trauma can certainly shape how it is expressed.

• It is not an excuse or a weakness: This is one of the most harmful myths. HSPs are often accused of being “too emotional” or “too fragile,” which can lead to deep shame. But sensitivity is not the same as being unstable or unable to cope. In fact, HSPs can be remarkably strong, especially when they learn to honour their needs and set boundaries.

Why HSP Women Often Carry Shame

Growing up as an HSP in a world that rewards toughness, fast thinking, and emotional control can be incredibly hard. Many HSP women recall being told to “toughen up”, “stop crying,” or “get over it.” Over time, these messages can lead to internalized shame.

You might wonder:

• Why do I cry so easily?

• Why can’t I just let things roll off my back like others do?

• What’s wrong with me?

These are not just passing thoughts—they’re the voice of shame, often shaped by years of being told that your sensitivity is a flaw. This shame can run deep, especially if you were raised in a family or culture where emotional attunement wasn’t valued.

Many HSP women also learn to mask their true feelings in order to fit in, leading to emotional exhaustion and burnout. Over time, this disconnection from self can contribute to perfectionism, people-pleasing, and even chronic health challenges. Reclaiming sensitivity as a legitimate way of being in the world is not just healing—it’s revolutionary.

How HSPs Can Overlap With Other Mental Health Struggles

HSPs are not immune to mental health challenges. In fact, because of how deeply they process and feel, they can be more vulnerable to things like:

• Burnout from taking on too much, especially in caregiving or helping professions

• Perfectionism and self-doubt due to internalized shame

• Anxiety from chronic overstimulation or environments that don’t support emotional regulation

• Depression if their needs for connection, beauty, and meaning are not met

However, the key difference is this: the sensitivity comes first. It’s the baseline. The mental health challenges are often secondary, and with the right support, many HSP women find they can flourish once they begin living in alignment with their nervous system, rather than fighting against it.

HSP And Therapy: Healing Begins With Being Seen

Many HSP women find deep healing through therapy, not because they are “broken,” but because therapy offers a space where their sensitivity is finally understood and respected.

When working with a therapist who understands HSP traits, you’re not asked to “toughen up” or push through discomfort. Instead, you’re invited to:

• Explore how shame and sensitivity have shaped your story

• Understand your nervous system and build emotional resilience

• Set boundaries that protect your energy and honour your values

• Reclaim your sensitivity as a strength, not a setback

Therapy can help HSP women develop tools to manage overwhelm, strengthen their voice, and stop apologizing for who they are. It also helps differentiate between what is a trait (like sensitivity) and what may be an untreated trauma, anxiety, or perfectionistic pattern.

The Ethics Of Honouring Your Sensitivity

It’s worth saying: acknowledging your HSP traits is not self-indulgent—it’s an act of ethical integrity. Many HSP women are therapists, teachers, mothers, leaders, and caregivers. Your ability to sense what others miss is a gift. But gifts need tending.

By seeking therapy or making lifestyle changes to support your nervous system, you are not “making excuses.” You are acting in alignment with your values of compassion, clarity, and care. You are preventing burnout. You are showing your children, clients, and communities that emotional awareness is not a liability—it’s a form of wisdom.

There is professional strength in knowing your limits, just as there is moral courage in showing up honestly and with care. The world needs sensitive people, especially ones who are no longer apologizing for who they are.

How HSPs Can Thrive With Support

Thriving as a Highly Sensitive Person is possible—and often begins with self-understanding. When HSP women start to understand their trait, everything shifts. What once felt like “too much” starts to feel like “just right” in the right environment. Here’s what helps:

• Therapy with someone who understands HSPs. Not all therapists are familiar with this trait. Finding one who can be transformative.

• Creating environments that support your nervous system. This includes reducing sensory overwhelm, setting boundaries with people or situations that drain you, and giving yourself space for quiet reflection.

• Naming and releasing internalized shame. You are not too much. You were too much for a world that didn’t understand you.

• Connecting with other HSP women. Community can be a balm to the deep loneliness many HSPs carry.

Support doesn’t mean dependency. It means giving yourself what you never got. It means becoming the person your younger self needed—gentle, grounded, and empowered.

Final Thoughts: Redefining What It Means To Be Sensitive

Being an HSP is not something to fix—it’s something to understand. It is not a diagnosis, but it does shape how you experience life, work, love, and relationships. If you are an HSP woman who has carried shame, exhaustion, or confusion around your sensitivity, know this: there is nothing wrong with you. In fact, there is so much that is right about you—your insight, your care, your creativity, your depth.

You do not need to be less. You need space to be more you.

Start Therapy for Highly Sensitive People in New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, Alberta, and Nunavut

If this article resonated with you, you’re not alone, and you don’t have to navigate this journey by yourself. I work with HSP women every day who are ready to release shame, set boundaries, and build lives that honour their sensitivity. To learn more about how therapy at my Calgary-based practice can help, or to book a free consultation, click the button below. Your sensitivity isn’t the problem—it might just be the start of your power.

Other Services Offered in Alberta, Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, and Nunavut

At IMatter, I offer a range of services to support mental well-being. In addition to support for HSPs, I’m happy to offer in-person and online support for therapists, perfectionism counseling, and therapy for women. I also offer support for overcoming burnout. Reach out today to begin your therapy journey today!