How Therapists Can Find the Right Therapist: Approaches, Boundaries, and Starting the Search

As therapists, we spend our days holding space for others.

We help clients explore their patterns, heal from trauma, and build lives that feel more grounded and whole. But when it comes to our own healing? That can be surprisingly complicated.

If you've ever typed “how to find a therapist when you're a therapist” or wondered “what kind of therapy is right for me,” you’re not alone. Finding a therapist when you already are one can stir up all kinds of feelings: vulnerability, skepticism, even shame. And yet, doing your own work is not only necessary; it’s one of the most courageous and professionally ethical choices you can make.

Why It Feels So Hard

There’s something uniquely disorienting about being on the other side of the therapy room. For many of us, especially those who are trauma-informed or highly sensitive, the thought of opening up to someone who may already know of us, or whom we might run into at a professional event, can feel deeply exposing. You may worry:

“Will they see me as competent if I’m struggling?”

“Can I find someone who won’t just mirror my own approach?”

“How do I find someone who doesn’t already know me professionally or personally?”

These are valid concerns. Being a therapist doesn’t protect you from needing therapy. It simply means you're more aware of the complexity involved.

What Kind of Therapy Is Right for Me?

When you're familiar with multiple modalities, it can be hard to narrow down what you actually need for yourself. Do you go with what you practice? Or what you haven’t tried yet?

Here are a few reflective questions to help guide your search:

1. What’s your current emotional bandwidth?

Are you seeking deep trauma work, or do you need a space that’s more about grounding and containment right now?

2. What has helped you in the past (if anything)?

Consider whether past therapeutic relationships or approaches felt supportive or activating.

3. Do you need someone highly specialized or someone more generalist and relational?

For example, if you're dealing with burnout, complex PTSD, or perfectionism rooted in early attachment wounds, you might look for someone who is trauma-informed and experienced in working with therapists.

4. What are you curious about?

This is a beautiful chance to try modalities you’ve referred others to but never experienced yourself, whether that’s EMDR, Flash, IFS, somatic therapy, or even expressive arts approaches.

5. What balance of expertise and attunement are you seeking?

Some therapists want to work with someone highly specialized, like a PhD psychologist trained in trauma who also understands the inner world of therapists. Others prioritize the relational dynamic first. Ideally, you don’t have to choose. A well-trained, experienced therapist with the depth of expertise and the capacity to hold nuance can be an excellent fit, especially for those of us who think and feel deeply.

Remember: you're not shopping for a technique. You’re seeking a relationship. It’s okay to want someone who brings strong clinical grounding and genuine presence.

Finding Someone Who Doesn’t Know You

The idea of working with someone “outside your circle” is crucial for many therapists. Here's how to protect that distance:

Look outside your geographical or professional region.

Virtual therapy has made this much easier. You can now work with a trauma-informed therapist across your province or even nationally, depending on licensure.

Search using directories with filter options.

Psychology Today, TherapyDen, EMDRIA, the IFS Institute, and the Flash Technique Therapist Directory all allow you to narrow your search by approach, population, and whether they work with other therapists.

Ask for anonymous referrals.

If you trust a colleague but don’t want to “out” your search, you might ask: “Do you know someone who’s skilled in X who won’t know me?”

Use your intuition.

As therapists, we often over-intellectualize this decision. Let your body weigh in. Did their website feel safe? Did something in their voice or wording resonate? Trust that.

Therapy Doesn’t Have to Be Forever

For some therapists, starting therapy again can feel like a massive commitment. But here’s the truth: you don’t have to sign on for years. It’s okay to enter therapy with clear boundaries and a defined purpose, whether it’s for a few months of support, a specific issue, or a professional recalibration.

Therapy can be a space for deep work, but it can also be a short-term pause for grounding, clarity, or healing during a transition.

You get to define the scope.

If You've Been Thinking About It, Now Might Be the Right Moment

If you’ve found yourself quietly searching phrases like “therapy for therapists near me” or “how to find a trauma therapist who gets it,” something in you is likely ready. That readiness doesn’t mean you have to leap into something overwhelming. It just means your system is asking for space.

And that’s something worth listening to.

Final Thoughts

You are just as deserving of care as your clients. You are not broken for needing support. In fact, the very things that make you a good therapist—your depth, sensitivity, and inner complexity—also mean that therapy can offer something meaningful, not just functional.

Working with someone who is both skilled and outside your usual circle can give you the clarity and containment you didn’t know you were missing.

Start Therapy for Therapists in Alberta, New Brunswick, Nova Scotia, and Nunavut

If you're a therapist, healer, or helping professional and you're looking for a trauma-informed space to feel seen — not as a role, but as a person — I’d be honoured to walk alongside you.

I bring the depth of PhD-level expertise, a relational and grounded style, and over a decade of experience supporting other clinicians.

You can learn more about my approach here or reach out for a consultation to explore if we’re a good fit. You don’t have to do this alone. Schedule a time with I Matter by clicking the button below!

Other Services Offered in Alberta, Nova Scotia, New Brunswick, and Nunavut

At IMatter, I offer a range of services to support your mental well-being. In addition to in-person and therapy for therapists, I’m happy to offer perfectionism counselling, therapy for women, HSPs, and more. Reach out today to begin your therapy journey today!